i have found myself caught in a culture of of sharing. surrounded by a people who will give you the shirt off their back and if they need one, expect you to do the same.
before ghanaians partake of their meal, whether you are at school, work, or home, they invite those around to join, "va me di nu" [come and eat] or they will simply say, "you are invited." and despite the declaration before each person takes a bite, this invitation is understood and goes without saying.
meals are built around community, where many people gather around one large bowl and eat, sitting closely together. the most common meals are fufu or banku served with a stew with meat (chicken, fish, goat). the fufu and banku are eaten with your right hand, pinching a piece from the ball and dipping it into the stew.
fufu is made from yam (more like a potato in the US) and plantain (like a giant, less sweet banana). the two are boiled and then placed in a giant wooden bowl or mortar (sitting on the ground). then sitting on a low stool a person will take 6 ft long stick, and pound the two together for about 30 minutes, creating a moist playdough-like consistency. this is served cool, in the shape of a large flattened ball.
banku is made from dried maize which has been soaked in water for several days and fermented. after the soaking it is taken to the mill and turned into a dough. then the dough is put in a pot and cooked with water and salt, stirring forcefully and often until it turns hard. the banku is also served in the shaped of a large flattened ball, though more dry than the fufu and it is very hot.
both of these require much manual labor, this is not an easy job; the pounding and stirring can last for nearly an hour and the fufu and banku are tough and thick. so, more than an offering of food and what it cost to purchase, it is an offering of work and of time and of energy.
as often as i am invited to join a meal, this act has encouraged me to be less greedy within my own life, and more open to sharing my life with others. and as often as a gift has been offered for no reason at all, i have learned to be less possessive of my belongings, and to give with more ease.
there have certainly been moments of tension... when it has been expected of me to share, i find myself fighting cultural instincts of possession and notions of working for what you want. but with the attitude of disowning selfishness i have discovered the recipe for my life to become more peaceful. i have learned to truly love those whom i offer to share my life with -- my food, my time, my money. i have learned to respect the beauty of a culture that takes care of each other, a people with open doors, that can always put another seat around the table.
